Ah yes… well the title pretty much says it all. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine having to call the Poison Control Center…TWICE as a mother.
This past Wednesday night C was being pretty difficult. She keeps complaining about her ear, but has none of the tell-tale signs of an ear infection. She’d pushed a chair up against the counter and climbed up to the cupboards and found some children’s Tylenol. I’m not a fan of giving medicine if there’s not really a need for it, but since she complained about her ear, I had D give her a half a dose. Apparently this wasn’t enough for her liking. She threw herself on the floor and proceeded to throw a fit. I told D just to leave her alone and she’d cry it out.
Cry it out she did, then that little stealth climbed back up the chair, back up the counter, and was somehow able to pop the lid off the children’s ibuprofen. At this point maybe two minutes had passed since the beginning of her fit, but D had jumped up because we heard her getting into something. He flipped on the light(oh yes, did I fail to mention she did this IN THE DARK!?) and C was pouring herself a little cup of ibuprofen like it was OJ.
I started freaking out. I smelled her breath- the flavor of the half dose of Tylenol we’d given her was grape- the flavor of the ibuprofen was berry. She still smelled like grape, but who knew what she’d really done. She’d managed to spill a TON of it in the cupboard, but there was no measuring that. There was about an ounce left in the 4 oz bottle, which still left at least 2 oz unaccounted for, considering how large the spill was.
I debated for about a minute what to do, then decided I’d rather be safe than sorry. I called poison control and the woman immediately started freaking out. I would think that PC would be somewhat like 911… you hire people who are going to be able to keep a calm head about it all. I was completely calm and just told her, quite a bit spilled-at least an ounce- and there was still a bit left in the bottle. She asked me to estimate how much, then asked me how much was left in the bottle before she’d gotten into it. I had no idea how much was in there! I give my kids medicine MAYBE every 3-4 months! She started getting really antsy and rushed and acted like she couldn’t believe I didn’t keep a running tally of how much was in my medicine bottles! Note to self… use a sharpie after every dose to mark how much is left in a bottle.
I let the lady know I had a food scale and could measure how many ounces were left in the bottle and she barked back that those were fluid ounces and my scale wouldn’t help- I really didn’t think that C had swallowed enough to be dangerous and this lady was having a spazz attack about fluid ounces. I cut her off mid sentence and I’m sure took her by surprise when I let her know I knew what fluid ounces were- this was a digital food scale that indeed measured those same fluid ounces. She fumbled and then told me “ok, let’s start with that.” idiot. Seriously, I was shocked that this lady was the one answering an emergency at 11:30 at night. Finally she calculated how much the maximum amount that could have been left in the bottle, plus Charli’s body weight and found that if she’d ingested all that was missing from the bottle(which we knew she didn’t) she would be fine.
None the less, still incredibly embarrassing! This is actually not my first time calling Poison Control… When T was about 2 she crawled up on the washing machine and drank the laundry stain remover Spray ‘n’ Wash. Thankfully because it contains enzymes it was not poisonous to her either.
Hopefully this will be the last time we need Poison Control’s services… I’m really not a fan of having to call there and look like an idiot! I suppose if I had children instead of monkeys who can scale washing machines and climb the cupboards I might not have as rough a go, but I’ll still keep my little monkeys any day! I’m just grateful that both of these incidents have not resulted in ER visits- and even more grateful to know that no longer do hospitals practice stomach pumping!!